Anaconda Review: I went into Anaconda (2025) wanting exactly one thing: a stupidly fun, self-aware riff on a cheesy 90s movie I grew up watching on TV. Big snake. Big personalities. A few laughs. Nothing deep. And honestly? The movie almost gets there. Almost.
This isn’t a remake in the normal sense. It’s not trying to redo the original scene-for-scene. Instead, it’s a movie about people trying to remake Anaconda, and accidentally dealing with a real one in the process. Meta, fourth-wall-ish, very aware of how ridiculous the whole idea is.
That part? I actually liked. But liking an idea and liking the movie are two very different things.
My Rating: 2.5/5
| Detail | Information |
|---|---|
| Movie Title | Anaconda (2025) |
| Genre | Comedy, Adventure, Meta-Satire |
| Director | Tom Gormican |
| Writers | Tom Gormican, Kevin Etten |
| Main Cast | Jack Black, Paul Rudd, Thandiwe Newton, Steve Zahn |
| Runtime | Approx. 90 minutes |
| Language | English |
| Country | United States |
| Release Year | 2025 |
| Based On | Inspired by Anaconda (1997) |
The Premise Is Smarter Than the Execution
The setup is genuinely solid. A group of adults who loved Anaconda as kids decide to remake it on a tiny, laughable budget. Think camcorders, duct-tape filmmaking, and way too much confidence. They head into the wilderness, convinced they’re making something fun and harmless.
Of course, there’s a real anaconda out there. Not CGI. Not fake. Very real. It’s a good hook. It’s the kind of concept that should work, especially with this cast. It even reminded me a little of Be Kind Rewind or the way 21 Jump Street took something outdated and flipped it into a comedy.
The problem is that the movie never commits to what it wants to be.
This Movie Can’t Pick a Lane
That’s the biggest issue. Sometimes it wants to be a goofy behind-the-scenes comedy. Sometimes it wants to be a satire about Hollywood nostalgia and remakes. Sometimes it wants actual creature-feature tension.
Instead of blending those ideas smoothly, it just jumps between them. You’ll get a scene that feels like it’s building suspense, then it undercuts itself with a joke that doesn’t land. Or you’ll be settling into a comedy bit, and suddenly it wants you to take the danger seriously.
It ends up feeling disjointed like three different drafts of the same movie stitched together.
And the trailer does the film no favors. If you’ve seen it, you’ve already seen most of the movie. There were multiple moments where I knew exactly where a scene was headed because the punchline had already been spoiled. Any tension or surprise was gone before it even started.
The Cast Deserves Better Material
Jack Black is fully committed. No surprise there. He brings energy, he leans into the absurdity, and a couple of his reactions got actual laughs out of me.
Paul Rudd is charming in that familiar, effortless way. You know the version of Paul Rudd you’re getting, and that’s exactly what shows up here.
But the biggest disappointment for me was Thandiwe Newton. She’s barely used. It feels like such a waste of someone who could’ve added real bite or chaos to this kind of movie.
There’s also this weird, unintentional humor the movie never acknowledges: these characters are clearly not the age the story wants them to be. The film keeps flashing back to them as kids obsessed with Anaconda, but Jack Black in 1997 was already a grown man in Hollywood.
Honestly, leaning into that, aging movie nerds chasing nostalgia, might’ve been funnier than pretending they’re thirty-somethings living out a childhood dream.
The Comedy Just Doesn’t Hit Hard Enough
This is where the movie really loses me. For a comedy, it’s surprisingly low on actual laughs. I chuckled a few times. Once or twice, I smiled. But I never had that moment where I thought, “Okay, this is working now.”
The funniest joke in the entire movie is a subtle, blink-and-you-miss-it gag involving the in-universe script being titled The Anaconda. That tiny, nerdy joke landed better than most of the bigger comedic moments.
A lot of the humor feels like inside baseball, jokes about filmmaking that only really land if you’re already deep into movie culture. If you’re just here for a funny snake movie, there’s a good chance you’ll feel left out. And when a 90-minute movie starts to feel longer than it is, that’s usually a bad sign.
Also Read: Christopher Nolan’s The Odyssey Trailer Is Here — And It Might Be His Most Emotional Epic Yet
What Works and What Doesn’t
| What Worked | What Didn’t |
|---|---|
| A genuinely clever concept | The tone is all over the place |
| Short runtime | Trailer spoils too much |
| A few smart meta jokes | Most jokes don’t land |
| Jack Black’s commitment | Thandiwe Newton is wasted |
| Self-awareness about the original | Completely forgettable overall |
Final Verdict: I Already Forgot Most of It
That’s not me being dramatic, that’s the truth. By the time I sat down to write this, I already had to strain to remember specific scenes. That’s never a good sign. Movies don’t have to be great to be memorable. They just have to leave something behind.
Anaconda (2025) didn’t. It’s not terrible. It’s not embarrassing. It’s just there. One of those movies that comes out, fills a holiday release slot, and quietly disappears.
If you’re curious, wait for streaming. If you’re hoping for something as sharp as 21 Jump Street or as bold as Tropic Thunder, this doesn’t come close. Good idea. Wrong execution. No bite.
